I used to think being a “good teammate” meant asking for approval.

Here’s what my boss would usually hear from me:

• “Hey, should we do this?”

• “Are you sure?”

• “Can I do this? Wanted to let you know before I start.”

But all that did was lead to resentment if things didn’t go well…

• “They told me I could! I double-checked…it’s not my fault.”

• “I could’ve done this better if I just did it myself.”

• “If I did things my way, things would’ve been better.”

But I can’t go through life making 0 mistakes and taking 0 accountability.

All that’s gonna do is keep me stuck in the same situations over and over.

So here’s what I realized I had to change…

taking your life into your own hands

If I kept asking for permission to live,

I’m not living life on my own terms.

What I do at work carries over to my personal life and relationships too.

I noticed when I’m more passive, I get resentful - and that’s not the way I want to live life.

So I was thinking how much easier it would be if I was more of a leader.

Before (passive):

• “Are you sure we should do this?”

After (leader):

• “I recommend we should do this. Here are the options, here’s my research, and here’s why I want this option.”

If I was a manager, I’d love it if someone said that to me - it makes my life easier so all I have to do is say yes.

real examples from last week

I started applying this mindset to other areas of my life too.

The other day, I went to this event with a ton of food stalls.

I really wanted to try this fried enoki mushroom snack,

But they didn’t have enough left so they told me they were sold out.

I remembered my learnings:

My life is mine. I can make things happen if I really want to.

So I straight up asked them:

“Can I try a sample?”

And to my surprise, they said yes 🤯

It was the same when I had to order more vegan protein powder.

I asked my fav brand:

“Can you guys send me a free box?”

And they said yes 🤯 

(Well, I have to make a video for them first but I never would’ve known if I didn’t ask.)

so if you’re feeling stuck…

Know that you have the power to change your life.

It’s not:

• I can’t, my boss won’t let me

• I can’t, I’m not good enough

• I can’t, I don’t know how

It’s:

• I can make my recommendation an easy thing to say yes to

• I can learn from any challenge to get better

• I can research and figure out a solution

Because you need to stop rejecting yourself before others have a chance to.

You never know who’ll say yes.

Til next time,

Jennifer